The “Shear” Delight of Story Cutting

A personal experience of “writer’s freedom” that you might also have experienced or that might help you in your own struggles, dealing with publisher word limits and editor feedback

In a recent article, I had mentioned cutting a WIP down from 55,000 to fewer than 20,000 words. In that article, I stressed how the process had good and bad consequences, but I didn’t mention the emotional effect.

It was incredibly freeing!

Before we go any further, a tip for you: make a copy of the original version before beginning your cutting.

All done?

Good, time to start.

Assessing the Story

In the case of this story, there was a main plot (a young woman pursuing her dream and a man who helps her) and a subplot (a former boyfriend teams with the young woman’s boss to stop that dream from being achieved).

That may not sound all that complicated, but it was causing a lot of convoluted twists and turns. I could have straightened things out but in the end decided to stick with the woman and her dream.

Another issue was a slightly political tone in a couple areas. Since this wasn’t intended as a political book but instead as a light romance at Christmastime, I had to make some changes.

Original text (208 words):

     Those same people never thought about whether the shop was surviving financially, about what the owner had paid to modify the space inside and equip it. They never thought about the cost of the ingredients nor the value of Haley Brice’s time to turn those ingredients into great tasting chocolates. And they never thought about the costs the government imposed such as business licenses, taxes, and hiring someone to make sure they adhered to a myriad of government regulations. Most important of all, as those people stood out in the cold, waiting for the shop owner come to the front door and unlock it, they had no idea how close to the edge that chocolate shop was.

     On the contrary, they, like most people, just assumed that a business is there and always will be. Then they show up one day and see a sign that says, “Out of Business.” And if they think anything at all, it is that the people running the business let the customers down by being stupid or lazy or greedy. The Sweet Delights Chocolate Shoppe was almost at the point of putting such a sign in their window in spite of Haley’s strenuous efforts every day to make the best chocolates possible.

Edited text (17 words):

But the people in that line had no idea how close that chocolate shop was to closing.

Phew! That was a chunk, but after the text was deleted (from the copy file I had made), I didn’t miss it a bit. That’s the feeling of freedom.

Another Example

Part of the plot change was taking out the story of how Sheila, the shop owner, had ended up leasing that space. I also cut out a character. And the focus of the story changed from Valentine’s Day to Christmas.

Original text (697 words):

     Historic Old Town Alexandria was expensive and didn’t get a lot of traffic on the narrow, brick-paved streets, yet Sheila had insisted that her shop be located there. She had found what she thought was the perfect building, dating back to the founding of the town in 1749. It was two stories tall, rather narrow, and had a great space for the shop on the first floor. The building owner was June Smith, an eighty-five-year old widow who lived on the second floor.
     When approaching June about renting that first floor, Sheila had played up the romantic angle of a shop selling handmade chocolates as well as the idea that something handmade was better quality, whether it was or not, versus something made by big candy makers.
     “None of that cardboard tasting machine made chocolate like you get in the grocery store,” Sheila had told June, using the cliché lines that had become so popular in recent years. “These will be made from the finest ingredients by an expert. We’ll have an array of chocolate types, from white chocolate and milk chocolate through bitter chocolate. We’ll have chocolates with tasty fillings like hazelnuts, raspberry cream, nougat, and caramel.”
     “Ooo … caramel!” June had cooed. “They used to be my favorites. I can’t eat chocolate anymore. Diabetes.”
     Sheila had ignored that and had continued talking effusively about the shop, keeping her words upbeat and positive.
     “Lovers love chocolate,” she had said. “Chocolates have been traditional gifts for a man in love to give the woman he loves.”
     “Oh, yes, I remember one young man years ago who would bring me heart-shaped boxes containing some of the best chocolates around.” June sat reminiscing a moment.
     Sheila had waited and then had said, “Yes, exactly, and that’s what I want to make available to lovers – young and old – now.” She had talked on, spinning a lover’s daydream and ignoring the stark reality.
     When Sheila had finished, June had indeed found the concept romantic and had felt rather nostalgic about the idea of a chocolate shop in the space that had had numerous businesses in it during the years that she and her husband had owned the building. Most of those businesses had lasted fewer than two years, so she was hopeful that The Sweet Delights Chocolate Shoppe would be a better survivor. Sheila had signed a three-year-lease for the ground floor, and every day over the past six months since the shop opened, June had looked out her window to watch how many customers came and went. She would see the line when the shop opened and then around five to seven people the rest of the day. At the end of the day when the shop closed, she would sigh heavily and have her diabetic’s dinner.
     June had agreed to lease the space to Sheila, who had then immediately gone to work, dividing the space into two parts – a small shop in front where customers would come and select their choice of chocolates from the cooled display case, and a preparation kitchen area in back with gleaming stainless steel countertops, a large commercial style refrigerator, a table with a marble top, a grinder, and other equipment. Then she had advertised for that “expert” and had been dismayed at how much most of them expected to be paid.
     Haley was Sheila’s last hope. Sheila read through the application that had been sent in about two weeks after the ad had first appeared in the local paper. She had been feeling a bit desperate at that moment, rejecting one applicant after another, mostly because they wanted too much money, and had called Haley in right away for an interview, in spite of the young woman’s meager experience in a commercial setting. The petite young woman who showed had disappointed Sheila at first as being too young and not looking like a chocolate maker should, in Sheila’s dream world, but she soon learned that Haley knew more about chocolate than the other experts she had interviewed combined, and Haley was willing to work for minimum wage. Sheila had hired her on the spot.
     “Stick to four hours a day,” Sheila had said.

Edited text (95 words):

     The building dated back to the founding of the town in 1749, was two stories tall, and rather narrow. The first floor was ideal for the shop, divided into two parts—a small area in front where customers would select their chocolates from the cooled display case, and a prep area in back that Sheila had outfitted with gleaming stainless steel countertops on wood cabinets, a large commercial style refrigerator, a marble topped table, and equipment for making chocolate. But historic locales weren’t always best for business pursuits, something Sheila was learning the hard way.
     She had signed the three-year lease and immediately advertised for a chocolate maker. Haley had been one of a dozen who had applied. She was also the most affordable.
     Haley was twenty-three and wanted the job desperately. She loved making chocolate and hoped the job would give her experience in a commercial setting so she could apply at bigger companies. She had dived into the work determined to do the best she could.

Again, once I had made the cuts, that feeling of freedom kicked in. Have no doubt that I liked the original text and that these cuts weren’t done easily or lightly. But once I had assessed the story and determined that the cuts were needed, the going was easier—in fact, a “shear” delight! Overall, the shortened work (based on word count, a novella) reads better, makes more sense, and has more of that heart-tug impact I wanted at the end.

You will also find yourself needing to do some rewriting, as the above example shows. That can be a freeing experience, too. Not every word you type is golden. Some are pyrite, brass, clay, or something even less savory (and that you definitely do not want to step in). Pick through and weed those fakers out.

Bottom Line (Final Note)

Take a deep breath, setting aside all emotion about some particular character or scene, and start cutting! You’ll find it very freeing.

Hope you found this helpful and have been inspired to start and/or continue writing!

See my article: Publisher Agent Fiction Genres Defined, with downloadable PDF.

Please check out my works in progress (WIPs). And thanks for reading.

NOTE: None of my text or images are AI-generated. You can rest assured that I pulled it all out of that stuff in my skull called a “brain.”